


Jade and Dave are at the walled off mouth of a cave

by itsrose



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Beaches, Caves, Earth C (Homestuck), F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:41:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22611946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsrose/pseuds/itsrose
Summary: They get inside and you won't believe what's in there
Relationships: Jade Harley/Dave Strider
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	Jade and Dave are at the walled off mouth of a cave

**Author's Note:**

  * For [itsdave](https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsdave/gifts).



JADE: open....sesame...?????  
JADE: yaaaaaaaay!!! :)  
DAVE: oh my god yes  
DAVE: what an unbelievable windfall  
DAVE: you were right  
DAVE: you were right all along  
DAVE: its like the real treasure all along was friendship  
DAVE: except we all knew that was a load of top shelf malarkey and instead of friendship it was a giant hoard of milk chocolate in a tropical seaside cave off the beaten path  
JADE: hehehehe oh dave!!  
JADE: lets go nuts!!!  
DAVE: yes this i can get behind  
DAVE: get that chocolate son  
DAVE: or i guess daughter no wait thats not right either even with all the ecto allowances we make to drastically extend the concept of biological family  
DAVE: the merriam webster dictionarys got a special envelope glued to the back cover with a cd rom just containing all of eight particular peoples ideas about what the hell even happened back there  
DAVE: one guys interview transcript about how he handed out bunnies to babies and you just KNOW hes lying about something  
DAVE: on accounta hes the biggest fucking dork in the entire universe and theres literally no way that event could have gone any other way and he knows that so he DEFINITELY wouldnt tell you about it if its actually what happened  
DAVE: and you KNOW he knows that and youre just panicking because you know once they get him down to the station and sitting under the bare light bulb swinging on a cable hell break in two minutes  
DAVE: and theyll find out he learned everything he knows from YOU and then YOUR goose is cooked  
DAVE: your goose is fried to a crisp  
DAVE: your goose was the last fry at the bottom of the basket and got tossed in with the next couple batches  
DAVE: later all hidin out in the bottom of that weird unfolded paper cup theyre always in  
DAVE: a little greasy stick of tuber sourced charcoal just hankerin to slide through the hole thats still between the side and the bottom you know what im talking about  
DAVE: all ready to just fall through and onto your brand new khakis and just RUIN em  
DAVE: just smear charcoal and oil on your lap like its the anything goes tutorial at nuthouse art college for jackson pollock recreations and insane idiots  
DAVE: no sirree bob that guy is just a normal thirteen year old poindexter  
DAVE: cant say ive ever heard of him  
DAVE: you say hes... a bad man, huh?  
DAVE: well i sure as hell dont know him officer he must have me confused with some other extremely slick customer  
JADE: dave!!!!  
DAVE: yeah  
JADE: stop it!!  
JADE: john didnt do anything weird!  
DAVE: yeah i think thats what i said  
JADE: whatever!!  
JADE: lets just enjoy all this chocolate :D  
DAVE: oh yeah sounds good  
JADE: tee hee!  
DAVE: oh wow  
DAVE: oh this is good  
JADE: heeheehee!

DAVE: oh crap jade stop  
DAVE: jade stop stop stop  
JADE: what? whats wrong??  
DAVE: holy shit jade i think we messed up we messed up bad  
JADE: what is it???  
DAVE: jade  
DAVE: youre A DOG  
JADE: oh my god!!!  
JADE: D: !!!!!  
JADE: hehehehe  
DAVE: hahahahaha  
JADE: hehehehehehehehe :D  


**Author's Note:**

> Jade was fine because although she was a dog she was fine. They continued to eat chocolate all day until they were sick


End file.
